Monday, May 3, 2010

Eat, Sleep, Teethe

Posted by Stephanie & Tyler at 3:00 AM

Having a baby is the most fun, life affirming, stressful thing i can even imagine. I'm 80% sure Skye is teething. I cant see a tooth yet but she is displaying behaviors that are pretty common during that teething phase such as being irritable, drooling, chewing on EVERYTHING (she even chews when she has nothing in her mouth, she looks like she is chewing her tongue), low grade fever and worst of all sleep disturbances. She has decided that she wants to wake up at 6am!! I really thought that 7 am was bad and i would pray every day that she could just stretch it out till 8am. 6 am for me is just impossible. Tonight Tyler said it took her AN HOUR to go to sleep! That NEVER happens! Usually she is so tired from a crammed packed day of play that she can hardly stay awake long enough to finish her bottle and when we put her down WE MAY get a slight whimper but usually she just silently goes to sleep. Nap times have changed also. She isn't sleeping as long as she normally does. She usually sleeps for 1.5 hrs to 2 hrs per nap but i can hardly get her to sleep for 45 min. Not to mention that she seems tired ALL DAY LONG. She is constantly rubbing her eyes. Its funny to me how unique motherhood is. I see all these signs of general unrest and it plagues me. It hangs on my mind like a weighted vest. I cant think of anything other than Skye and these sleep problems. I think of it like a puzzle that i need to piece together all of the reasons why Skye has changed things all of a sudden. How can I fix this? Its amazing how Tyler can see the changes and with all of his serenity and wisdom can accept the changes as is and continue on his path without missing a step while i sit here like a spinning top. As I'm sitting here I wish i could be more like Tyler and not let things like this bother me. I wish i could sit back and not care if she got 15 bottles a day or had 4 naps of 15 min each. I wish i didn't feel held back and could take her all around town and completely disregard her nap schedule. I wish i could be selfish and work Skye into MY life. I cant. I am completely unable. The second i heard that first cry on September 16, 2009 and felt her warmth as they laid her on my chest for the first time it was all over for me. The instant she looked into my eyes i lost myself. I am no longer able to disregard all of those seemingly minute ridiculous things. I am Skye's mother now and as such will spend the rest of my life trying desperately to make her life easier, calmer, happier!


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